Early in the morning I was at Cobb’s Hill Reservation, the highest point in Rochester, NY.   I felt how amazing it is to take a breath in the fresh morning air. It seems like it gives the feeling of being full of life. I remembered how yesterday I was talking about motherhood with my friends. The question that stuck in my mind was: what could be the reasons that make motherhood so hard?  Why are we struggling with it so much? Is raising a human being that difficult? Or is there a problem with us that makes it so hard?

I remember asking myself these questions, but there are many other questions about motherhood that flee my mind. I don't blame anyone, though.  It is a fact of motherhood. I have five children and still feel like a beginner on this path. 

My cat has four little kittens growing up in peace, no madness, no anger, just peace. I see this happening right in front of my eyes. Every day I watch them, such a beautiful harmony of mother and her babies. I thought that if a mom’s natural constitution, which is fitrah, didn’t spoil or change, she naturally becomes a perfect mother after giving birth. Allah (SWT) has created humans in a perfect form, as He said in the Quran. 

I thought about the mother cat again, and realized that the most important condition we lost, due all of our competing, outside concerns, is tranquility (sakinah). 

The mother cat is full of stillness. Her body and soul are being used for the kittens, and she is content with it.  She ultimately gives herself over to the service and needs of the kittens. We just put the food and water down for them, nothing else. She gives the best for her kittens. 

I think we should heal the wounds of our hearts first. I mean we need to go back to our fitrah. Our original disposition.